...a · thousand · tears

and even if we never talk again., please remember that i'm forever changed by who you are and what you mean to me.

you aren't going to be his first, his last, or his only .. he's loved before, he will again. but if he loves you now, what else matters? he's not perfect, you aren't either - and the two of you will never be perfect, but if he can make you laugh atleast once, cause you to think twice, and admits to being human and making mistakes, hold on to him the most you can. he is not going to quote poetry, he's not going to be thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you can break. don't hurt him, don't change him. don't expect more than he can give. try not to overanalyze. smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad .. and miss him when he's not there.

sometimes it's best to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve.

you can learn a lot about a person when you listen to the songs that actually mean something to them.

rester avec moi a jamais -- stay with me forever

here's to the nights that turned into mornings and the friends that turned into family.

from the outside looking in, you can't understand it. and from the inside looking out, you can't explain it.

i'm staring at your photograph, remembering all those times you made me laugh.

we don't choose who to love anymore than we choose when it ends.

smile, even if you aren't happy because if you wear a smile on your face, it just might spread to your heart.

After a while, you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. You begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises. And you start to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open. You learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain. After a while, you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. You learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong, and you really do have worth. You learn that with every goodbye, there's a hello. Take chances. Tell the truth. Date someone totally wrong for you. Say no. Spend all your cash. Fall in love. Be random. Say I love you. Cry. Apologize. Tell someone how much they mean to you. Drink until the bottle's empty. Sing out loud. Tell an asshole how you feel. Let someone know what they're missing. Laugh until your stomach hurts. Live Life.

just don't tell him you saw me here, drowning in this bottle trying to make him disappear.

life comes without guarantees except that smiling brightens your face and laughing enhances your eyes, and falling in love .. will change your life.

dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to mourn the un-mailed love letters & the lonely decembers. the children ask, does it ever go away? they're asking about heartache & you know better than to lie so you answer truthfully & you say, no, it doesnt, it doesnt go away. one day you're jumping in puddles & the next thing you know 30 years have passed & you're telling your kids to walk around them. everyone is taught to look both ways before crossing the street & to talk quietly in the library, but no one ever learns anything that matters, like how to keep breathing when your heart breaks in half.

there's a difference in what we long for, what we settle for, and who we are meant for.

Love isn't perfect. It isn't a fairytale or a storybook. & it doesn't always come easy. Love is overcoming obstacles, facing challenges, fighting to be together, holding on & never letting go. It is a short word, easy to spell, difficult to define, & impossible to live without. Love is work, but most of all, Love is realizing that every hour, every minute, & every second was worth it because you did it together.

Distance means so little, when someone means so much.

love yourself first and everything falls into line

Crisp leaves, coffee shops, and long, plaid scarves. Autumn winds, photographs, and starry nights. Our hands laced together, and you squeezing me tight. I can't remember a Fall ever feeling so right.

that i'm just going to start putting up some quotes that i really enjoy up on this thing instead of writing journal entries. well, i probably still will write something about my life, but only my "friends" can read it -- funny, i only have 2 and they don't write in this anymore. haha

the one in this entry is going to be the mad long one i had posted last week...


Here's to all those girls who used to be his number one. The ones who waited all night for him to call, only to check the caller ID the next morning and be disappointed. The ones who made it through that bitter break up, dried your own tears, and moved on with your life, only to have him walk back in it months later like nothing ever happened. Those of you who cried on the first day you talked again because you knew exactly where this phone call was going. The ones who listened to him say, I only want to be your friend, one day, and the next, listened to him say how much he loves and misses you. We deserve something, and this is our tribute.Here's to the ones that took him back, hoping that maybe this time, he was different, hoping that maybe people really do change. We listened to our friends tell us that we were stupid for even thinking about giving him another chance, caught crap from our parents, and even snuck around to see him for while. We went through the great stage with no fights all over again. We started this out thinking it would be just friends, and ended up falling in love with him again. We wanted nothing more in the world than to hear him tell us he loved us too, that even though things were bad in the past, they would be different this time. And when we finally heard it, it was like we were dreaming. This is for us. Here's to the ones who believed what he said, sat around all over again  waiting for a phone call that might come in a few hours, or a few days.  Here's for the tears cried and dried all over again. We wanted so  desperately to believe that he was really busy, he couldn't possibly call us  at that moment, or even that he fell asleep early. We trained ourselves to  believe the lies because we wanted to believe we had found the one for us. We learned to SETTLE for someone who didn't treat us the way we should be treated. Here's for the ones who did their hair and make up and put on their prettiest earrings, only to hear him say that he couldn't see us today. The ones who never believed it when people told us there might be someone else. We just couldn't believe that he could do this to us again. This is for those great girls, who loved him more than words can say, and took him back no matter what happened last time because they couldn't bear to look back on their lives one day and wonder "what if". This is for the girls that stayed up all night long listening to him whine  about an ex girlfriend who cheated on him, and cried during the entire conversation. The ones who hoped he would realize that he deserved better,  that he deserved us. When he said that he loved you, but he was in love with  her, he didn't mean it. This is for the ones that held on to something that was never there to begin with. This is for us girls, who somehow managed to get him to forget about her, and get him to tell us that he was in love with us again, only to have him tell us three weeks later that "things were going too fast, he needs time." Here's to the girls who couldn't cry to their friends because of how stupid  they felt. The ones who held it all in when things came crumbling to pieces  again. This is for the ones who couldn't bear to even tell their mom what  was going on, for fear of an "I told you so." The ones that could just TELL that they had made a mistake ever allowing him into their hearts, and their dreams again. We knew that we deserved better the entire time, that we deserved a guy who  would call when he said he was going to, one that would come see us whenever he got the chance, one that would really care about us. We just wanted the one that we loved like that. Here's for the ones that FINALLY realized that he never gave a crap about them. Here's for the time that he broke your heart again. This is for those days spent trying to hold back the tears, and the tears that turned into anger, then disappointment. Here's for us girls who finally realized that we deserve better. This is for those confusing days, when you miss him,  and want nothing more than to hear his voice, or feel his arms around your waist. Stay strong, and remember that relationships are like broken glass, sometimes it's better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together and get hurt. Remember the times you cried, and how long it  took you to even be able to look at another guy like that. When "your song" comes on the radio, turn the station. When the day comes that he realizes what a mistake he made and tries calling, turn your phone off. When he tries coming to your house, don't answer the door. Think of the broken promises, and the lies, the manipulation and the tears, the wasted moments and staying up all night wondering where the crap he was. Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night, and how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn't him, and realized that once again, he hadn't called when he said he was going to. One day, you'll find a guy who's worth all the tears, but he won't make you cry. You may think that you'll never care about someone like you did that guy that you always ran back to, but you will. It's gonna hurt like crap,  and it's going to need time to heal, but the point is, it will heal. This is for those girls, who fell back in love with a guy, only to get hurt all over again.